A diamond in the asphalt

"I had a dream a T-Rex was chasing me and trying to bite me. I ate his heart and it tasted wike strawberry mint sour cream cheese. It tasted good. I saw a shark and I punched him in the nose. And ven I ate his heart. It didn't taste wike anyfing. It was just sour." Joren

"All my life I have been wanting a weapon like a secret weapon like a pocketknife or a bee stinger. I want to kill a bee and cut off it's stinger and use it as a weapon. Let me explain to you how a bee stinger could be useful in battle. First, I am going to have a box that has all kinds of stingers in it. Then I will have a computer that I can type in which stinger I want so that it can attach to my weapon and then I can sting the enemy in the bum. It will bleed and be very painful" Eirik

"Joren, go put the knife away." I said. "no, you put the knife away mom." "Joren, don't talk back to me please." "No, you don't talk back!"
Then he took my cell phone and threw it in a hole in the dirt. Then he hit me. Then he went to time out in his room. Later, despite my efforts, he wore his hat and backpack and shoes to bed. Our friend Trevor commented that he had never met a kid that had such a sweet and innocent voice and demeanor that could be so capable of mischief. I agree. And he is such a sweetheart too.

Tonight Eirik picked up a piece of asphalt and brought it home to give me because he thought it was coal and he wanted to squeeze it really hard tonight and make it into a diamond for me. When Paul explained to him what it takes to make a diamond he started to cry. When Paul told him that he had brought home a piece of asphalt and that it was not even coal, he was devastated. I told him I would pretend that it was our very special diamond in the rough and I would save it to remember the special treasure he brought for me. That made him feel a little better. Then Joren found a hammer and sneaked away my "diamond" and smashed it into pieces to get the "diamond" out of it. This threw Eirik into a tizzy. I told him I would pick the largest piece and treasure it. Boy, what a sweet sensitive darling boy.

"Mother, I had a really hard day. I went through some really disappointing situations. I had only 4 good things happen and 10 bad things happened." Eirik

Paul accidently showed Eirik a clip of Golum while they were watching cartoons. Eirik turned to Paul and said, "Dad, I'm 5! Why would you show that to me. You know how I get nightmares!"

When Eirik ate some mango the other day he said, "mom, I can see how when I'm older I might like this, but right now, I just prefer not to eat it."

"I hope I can lift up the sun mom. But how will I? Maybe with a big big big big ladder." Joren

"I just have secret spy stuff. Speaking of spies, I am a spy!!!" Joren

"I don't have enough bones in my leg cuffs so little tiny drops of rain covered the cardboard and made the cardboard nice and soft and it makes my legs feel good. Then it turns into tuna noodle casserole and makes me feel good. Cardboard is good fr my body. I'm not saying cardboard for cars, just drops of cardboard go in my legs. Just all the stuff are going in right now. All the stuff I told you and it makes me feel good." Joren (I really have NO idea.)